Shilpa Suraj
On Writing, The Writer Gal Letter

Guest Post: Writer friends- friend or foe?

Hey y’all,

It is with great pleasure that I host a personal pal of mine, Shilpa Suraj, who is so fricking talented, she makes me green with envy! Read on here to find out what she thinks of me, and everyone else like me:P (#justkidding) You can find my opinions on What kind of friends writers really are at Shilpa’s blog.

Writer Gal

Shilpa Suraj

As the saying goes, it takes all kinds to make the world go around.

Aarti, my blog host for the day, recently did a guest post on my blog about ‘Writer friends – friend or foe.’ An interesting, humorous take on the insecurities, complexes and mindsets of her writer friends. In the writing community, as in life, you meet so many different kinds of people – the good, the bad and the ugly.

Some with whom you bond and find a friend for life, some who think because they’ve been writing a little longer than you have the right to give you condescending advice followed by virtual pats on the head and some who, well let’s not go down that ugly road. I have in turn, learned to enjoy the genuine friendships, smile politely at the condescension and ignore the nastiness. Again, just like in life.

It would be wonderful if we lived in a world of secure, confident people who saw only the good in others. Yes, yes, I know…..Fact is we live in a world fraught with competition. The thirst to succeed and in some cases just the need to survive in a field that could see you disappearing from the public consciousness without a trace is sometimes all consuming. It leads people to behave in ways that, I hope, in other times would be unthinkable.

I believe, truly believe, that if your writing shines, if your characters leap off the page and take your readers on an unbelievable ride, you’re halfway to making a place for yourself in people’s hearts. The other half of the battle is getting people to know your book exists. If they don’t read it, they’ll never know if your writing shines like the sun or deserves to be thrown into the inky depths of a bottomless abyss.

Good writer friends help you over those moments of ‘I’m not good enough.’ ‘My writing stinks.’ ‘My hero is a shit. How do I redeem him?’ ‘No one knows I exist.’ ‘Will I ever be published?’ They help you navigate a world and career that is light years away from the one inhabited by your family and friends.

Did you notice the good at the start of that sentence? Very very important distinction.

In my opinion, you learn to sift the good from the bad. You don’t overreact to petty nastiness, you don’t be overfriendly with people you barely know because you believe the world is full of people with hearts of gold (Really, does anyone believe that?) and you don’t judge people who inadvertently or otherwise fall short of your expectations.

Like I keep saying, it’s life-a true mixed bag. Bouquets, brickbats, opportunities, success, failure, hope, disappointment. All you need to do is sift.

And Aarti – You are the whackiest, funniest, most enthusiastic, loyal friend I’ve gained on this crazy roller coaster ride. And about that hot guy we were discussing…..let’s take this offline shall we? 🙂 

Isn’t she super awesome, y’all?

Here’s the skinny on Shilpa Suraj – Romance Writer.

The author of Harlequin, India’s ‘The Girl He Left Behind’ and ‘Rescued by Love,’ Shilpa Suraj was a year and a half when she was first introduced to the world of books. Her mother would park her with a picture book on the floor of the kitchen while she finished her cooking for the day. While books in all genres interest her, it was romance that captured her heart. While racing through every romantic fiction book she could beg, borrow or buy, her over active imagination started to work overtime and weave its own stories.
Seven years in the corporate world followed by a spell of entrepreneurship crystallised her belief that all she really wanted to do was give life to the stories bubbling inside of her. She briefly managed to tear herself away from the world of fiction to find her own happily ever after and now spends her time happily juggling both the loves of her life – family and writing romances.
To know more about her, you can reach her at

6 thoughts on “Guest Post: Writer friends- friend or foe?”

  1. It is all about learning isn’t? Learning the good from the bad, learning the difference between the enablers and the ones who will take every chance to shoot you down, and the true good friends amongst the fake praisers. I have seen all in my two years here, and sometimes I still cannot make the distinctions.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Hi Shilpa and Aarti! Thanks for a lovely post. For the most part, I’ve found writer friends to be extremely helpful and supportive. I like the point you made about not judging people. Sometimes one can have bigger expectations than people can meet. So it’s important to realise that they may have their own point of view and give them space.
    Thanks for your friendship, girls 🙂


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